I'm still mulling over whether to send Zoe to Anneliese. I'm hoping to find a school that is like it here in San Diego or Encinitas. I should have done this earlier as this is a bit late in the day. Most schools are accepting applications now and evidently one is supposed to do tours before February. Anyhow, I discovered that there is a cooperative preschool nearby in Solana Beach. A cooperative school is one where parents are expected and obligated to help at the school. While perusing its website, I came across a section with helpful advise for parents while they are "helping out" at the school. I thought it made a lot of sense and it gave me a fresh perspective on how I should interact with Zoe and Evan when it comes to certain types of play and when they are say drawing or painting.
A common mistake made by parents as they interact with children is to ask a busy child, “What are you making...What is that?”. Young children many times are not making anything when they are drawing, painting, etc. What they are doing is learning to grip a crayon or paintbrush and learning different strokes or movements with their fingers and hands. They are experimenting with colors and textures, and just having fun along the way. When we suggest to a child that there is a desired end result, we are taking away from the above process of learning. The process is much more important than the product. We want children to feel comfortable in their own creative expression, no matter how it turns out in the end. We like to provide children with many open-ended activities, which may not be aesthetically pleasing to a parent who is a product-orientated person. Some better types of questions are “Tell me about this...Tell me about the colors you used...Wow...look at this pattern over here...” etc. When you are at the playdoh or clay table, or drawing with the children, please let the children create their own things. If you start drawing a field of flowers how you see it, this may intimidate a child to draw their own pictures. Soon, you will hear, “You do it for me ... I can’t draw a field of flowers like you can!” Please stick with simple drawings of patterns and designs; with playdoh or clay, use simple movements like rolling balls, smashing pancakes, etc.
(Sandy Hill Nursery School http://www.sandyhillnurseryschool.com/helperguidelines.html)
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Friday, February 11, 2011
Education Choices
I must be out of my mind, but I am considering sending Zoe to a school that is 50 minutes north of us by car. I found out about this school - Anneliese School - only a few days ago. Idle curiosity brought me to their website. Photos of the school showed happy children gardening, playing, working in classrooms that are warm, cozy and colorful.
Then, I got to the letter the founder of the school, Anneliese Schimmelpfennig, wrote to parents speaking of the school's philosophy:
"children who are free to learn without force and pressure from parents, become more confident and balanced people and prove to be successful in their careers and in social conditions. Children whose parents encourage their learning but do not pressure, nudge but do not nag, feel that their parents trust them as learners.
In turn, children begin to take responsibility for their own learning and try their best at whatever academic and social situation they encounter in school. They want to do their best, not because they want parental approval, but because they have made a commitment to themselves. This intrinsic desire for learning comes from the child's inner resources. Parents need to learn to let these "inner" resources of the child emerge, which is why letting go of the pressure is so important.
I do not in any way suggest that parents remove themselves from their children's learning experience. On the contrary, parents should play an active role in the intellectual, creative and social development of the child and provide a rich, stimulating environment. This is different than putting pressure on the child to "do well in school." Children inherently flourish in an environment where love, support and encouragement are present.
The ultimate purpose of this message is to remind you to enjoy your children's wonderful development as they grow as human beings. Each child is born with a talent or a strength that we as educators and you as parents must discover and encourage. Every child is unique in their development; this includes reading, writing, and other cognitive processes. We must allow each child to unfold as both a human
being and a learner in their own time.
There is no finish line or "winner." A child who doesn't read until eight can become a great poet or doctor, or a child who only plays can become a great thinker or leader. We can raise intelligent, productive, balanced children if we give them a chance to find their own way, with their own rhythm--without the constant stresses and demands of parent "pushing" them to succeed.
Our greatest contribution as parents and educators is to raise children who have a wonder for life and a love for learning."
I was hooked. Anneliese seems the epitome of what I consider a great - or ideal - school for children. The visit today confirmed it. The school grounds had a magical quality about it. But what is a great/ideal school? For me, an ideal school offers an environment for a child to blossom in; it offers the child ample opportunities to learn about himself/herself, the world about them, and his/her position within this world. It teaches "worldly" knowledge, but its most important task is to tend to the growth of the whole person by fostering a love of learning, confidence in self, and love for others.
As much as I like Zoe's current preschool and her teachers, I have never been 100% in love with it or without my doubts about it. Thus far, even though Zoe is finally accepting of it now, she does not approach school days with unadulterated joy. Even though we like that she learns a lot (e.g. vertebrates versus invertebrates, seasons, planets in our solar system etc etc), I wonder if it has a bit too much "formal" instruction for Zoe's personality and temperament.
I considered the Waldorf school nearby before, but I thought that the Waldorf philosophy of eschewing all "formal" education at this stage to be too extreme too. Anneliese School seem just perfect.
I'm really tempted.The distance is one thing. Dennis is very supportive of most things I want, but he is not enthusiastic about my driving such distances (even if it is just twice a week) to take Zoe to school. The other thing is cost. Not factoring gas and time, the fees are slightly higher. The other question is whether we would have Zoe attend both Anneliese and Brilliant Kids (her current school). Zoe's current school is, I think, marvelous in imparting a lot of knowledge and instilling discipline. There is value in that too. We might not be able to afford both schools at once. Another consideration too is that I don't feel the need for Zoe to be in school more than three or four days a week right now. Time at home is valuable too, even if it is spent just playing or idling or reading. Zoe is only 3 1/2 years old after all!
All thess choices!! Zoe made it clear that she wants to go back to Anneliese. When we got back to the car, she said she really liked the school, that she liked the garden teacher, and asked me if she could "come back to this school when I get bigger?"
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Here is what Anneliese Schools have to say about their Values:
The three core values of Love, Freedom and Self-Discipline, provide the cornerstone of our education. As a trio, these values define the essential style of Anneliese Schools: imaginative, colorful, exuberant, but also maintaining a sense of routine, orderliness and respect. These values are fully interdependent. For example, one cannot enjoy Freedom without Self-Discipline, and one cannot teach Self-Discipline without Love.
Love
Anneliese Schools believe that both teachers and parents love for the children radiates into them and models for them how to be kind to each other. Love and discipline go together. Children need tools to become self-realized adults; they need discipline to make the most of themselves. When the children know they are loved, you can then expect from them self-discipline, and an engagement in the learning material you present them.
Freedom
Anneliese Schools seeks to teach children that freedom is not chaos, but that it is something different. Freedom does not mean giving children free reign, or allowing an environment in which there is an absence of discipline and structure. Rather, freedom means watching children with careful eye, while at the same time allowing them to make mistakes and feel experiences out for themselves. Anneliese Schools believes that freedom is the natural, exploratory, curious instinct in a child. Because this is innate in children, adults simply need to create an atmosphere in which children feel free to explore and take risks with learning, allowing them to come to their own conclusions in their own ways, and on their own time.
Self Discipline
Children generally associate discipline with feeling controlled, and being punished. We encourage our teachers to help children develop self-discipline for their own benefit. It is a tool for self-knowledge, a way for students to understand their own humanity, and to explore the world safely. These children don’t require as much external direction, but feel secure enough to make decisions for themselves, and strong enough to explore their interests. When children learn how to discipline themselves, they understand how to try, how long to try and when to stop.
We hold students up to high standards for behavior and respect here at our School. Our behavioral expectations are modeled on the following values:
I AM SELF-DISCIPLINED
I EXERCISE SELF-CONTROL
I EXPRESS MY DISAGREEMENT CONSTRUCTIVELY
I AM INQUISITIVE
I PARTICIPATE
I RESPECT TEACHING
I SUPPORT OTHERS
I ACKNOWLEDGE and LEARN FROM MY MISTAKES
I LISTEN ATTENTIVELY
I THINK CREATIVELY
Then, I got to the letter the founder of the school, Anneliese Schimmelpfennig, wrote to parents speaking of the school's philosophy:
"children who are free to learn without force and pressure from parents, become more confident and balanced people and prove to be successful in their careers and in social conditions. Children whose parents encourage their learning but do not pressure, nudge but do not nag, feel that their parents trust them as learners.
In turn, children begin to take responsibility for their own learning and try their best at whatever academic and social situation they encounter in school. They want to do their best, not because they want parental approval, but because they have made a commitment to themselves. This intrinsic desire for learning comes from the child's inner resources. Parents need to learn to let these "inner" resources of the child emerge, which is why letting go of the pressure is so important.
I do not in any way suggest that parents remove themselves from their children's learning experience. On the contrary, parents should play an active role in the intellectual, creative and social development of the child and provide a rich, stimulating environment. This is different than putting pressure on the child to "do well in school." Children inherently flourish in an environment where love, support and encouragement are present.
The ultimate purpose of this message is to remind you to enjoy your children's wonderful development as they grow as human beings. Each child is born with a talent or a strength that we as educators and you as parents must discover and encourage. Every child is unique in their development; this includes reading, writing, and other cognitive processes. We must allow each child to unfold as both a human
being and a learner in their own time.
There is no finish line or "winner." A child who doesn't read until eight can become a great poet or doctor, or a child who only plays can become a great thinker or leader. We can raise intelligent, productive, balanced children if we give them a chance to find their own way, with their own rhythm--without the constant stresses and demands of parent "pushing" them to succeed.
Our greatest contribution as parents and educators is to raise children who have a wonder for life and a love for learning."
I was hooked. Anneliese seems the epitome of what I consider a great - or ideal - school for children. The visit today confirmed it. The school grounds had a magical quality about it. But what is a great/ideal school? For me, an ideal school offers an environment for a child to blossom in; it offers the child ample opportunities to learn about himself/herself, the world about them, and his/her position within this world. It teaches "worldly" knowledge, but its most important task is to tend to the growth of the whole person by fostering a love of learning, confidence in self, and love for others.
As much as I like Zoe's current preschool and her teachers, I have never been 100% in love with it or without my doubts about it. Thus far, even though Zoe is finally accepting of it now, she does not approach school days with unadulterated joy. Even though we like that she learns a lot (e.g. vertebrates versus invertebrates, seasons, planets in our solar system etc etc), I wonder if it has a bit too much "formal" instruction for Zoe's personality and temperament.
I considered the Waldorf school nearby before, but I thought that the Waldorf philosophy of eschewing all "formal" education at this stage to be too extreme too. Anneliese School seem just perfect.
I'm really tempted.The distance is one thing. Dennis is very supportive of most things I want, but he is not enthusiastic about my driving such distances (even if it is just twice a week) to take Zoe to school. The other thing is cost. Not factoring gas and time, the fees are slightly higher. The other question is whether we would have Zoe attend both Anneliese and Brilliant Kids (her current school). Zoe's current school is, I think, marvelous in imparting a lot of knowledge and instilling discipline. There is value in that too. We might not be able to afford both schools at once. Another consideration too is that I don't feel the need for Zoe to be in school more than three or four days a week right now. Time at home is valuable too, even if it is spent just playing or idling or reading. Zoe is only 3 1/2 years old after all!
All thess choices!! Zoe made it clear that she wants to go back to Anneliese. When we got back to the car, she said she really liked the school, that she liked the garden teacher, and asked me if she could "come back to this school when I get bigger?"
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Here is what Anneliese Schools have to say about their Values:
Core Values and Behavioral / Learning Values
At Anneliese Schools, we define ourselves, not so much by rules and systems or measurable outcomes for our students, but by the values we seek to exhibit collectively, consistently, and courageously. Following Anneliese Schools’ trio of core values, we have added additional behavioral and learning values that we cultivate in community. For all of the educators, parents, children and administrators who work and learn at Anneliese Schools, our values provide us with a basic framework for how we aspire to act and communicate.The three core values of Love, Freedom and Self-Discipline, provide the cornerstone of our education. As a trio, these values define the essential style of Anneliese Schools: imaginative, colorful, exuberant, but also maintaining a sense of routine, orderliness and respect. These values are fully interdependent. For example, one cannot enjoy Freedom without Self-Discipline, and one cannot teach Self-Discipline without Love.
Love
Anneliese Schools believe that both teachers and parents love for the children radiates into them and models for them how to be kind to each other. Love and discipline go together. Children need tools to become self-realized adults; they need discipline to make the most of themselves. When the children know they are loved, you can then expect from them self-discipline, and an engagement in the learning material you present them.
Freedom
Anneliese Schools seeks to teach children that freedom is not chaos, but that it is something different. Freedom does not mean giving children free reign, or allowing an environment in which there is an absence of discipline and structure. Rather, freedom means watching children with careful eye, while at the same time allowing them to make mistakes and feel experiences out for themselves. Anneliese Schools believes that freedom is the natural, exploratory, curious instinct in a child. Because this is innate in children, adults simply need to create an atmosphere in which children feel free to explore and take risks with learning, allowing them to come to their own conclusions in their own ways, and on their own time.
Self Discipline
Children generally associate discipline with feeling controlled, and being punished. We encourage our teachers to help children develop self-discipline for their own benefit. It is a tool for self-knowledge, a way for students to understand their own humanity, and to explore the world safely. These children don’t require as much external direction, but feel secure enough to make decisions for themselves, and strong enough to explore their interests. When children learn how to discipline themselves, they understand how to try, how long to try and when to stop.
Behavioral & Learning Values
We hold students up to high standards for behavior and respect here at our School. Our behavioral expectations are modeled on the following values:- Self Discipline & Independent Learning
- Respect for teaching & the Teacher
- Support of others
- Self-control
- Expression of Constructive Disagreement
- Active Participation
- Inquisitiveness
- Creativity
- Attentive Listening
- Acknowledging & Learning from Mistakes
I AM SELF-DISCIPLINED
- I am prepared for class and learning
- I bring completed homework & supplies
- I am ready to learn when class begins
- I remain focused and on task even when there are distractions
- I put effort and care into my work
- I persevere when I am challenged, discouraged or tired
- I take action to do extremely well
- I refrain from making negative comments & gestures
I EXERCISE SELF-CONTROL
- I hold my body with dignity
- I am aware of my own physical space and the physical space of others
- I don’t crowd my classmates
- I don’t go through my classmates’ property
- My physical behavior is appropriate to where I am
- I don’t rough-house or run in the classroom
- I keep my hands to myself during class-time
I EXPRESS MY DISAGREEMENT CONSTRUCTIVELY
- I refrain from making negative comments
- I refrain from making negative gestures, and unpleasant sounds
- I think before I speak
- I value my opinion enough to articulate it calmly
I AM INQUISITIVE
- I ask questions about things because life is interesting
- I ask How and Why because finding answers is an adventure
- I ask questions because it keeps my mind alive
- I ask questions because I care (about people and the world)
I PARTICIPATE
- I participate because I am not afraid to make mistakes
- I share my ideas
- I participate in discussions because I value myself
- I participate respectfully
- I can participate by listening attentively
I RESPECT TEACHING
- I respect teachers because they help me discover who I am and help me imagine who I can become
- I know that my teacher has a lot to teach me
- I am grateful for the opportunity to learn
- I respect my teacher and his or her teaching by
- listening to directions
- not talking to my friends while my teacher is teaching
I SUPPORT OTHERS
- I use my words to positive ends, because what I say is a reflection of my character
- I take opportunities to make friendly comments to my classmates
- I refrain from putting people down
- I refrain from gossiping
- I am strong enough to stand up for the fair treatment of others
- I am strong enough to stand up for others in need
- I know that each person deserves my tolerance and patience
I ACKNOWLEDGE and LEARN FROM MY MISTAKES
- I recognize that it takes maturity and strength to acknowledge my mistakes
- I take responsibility for my mistakes even when it is difficult
- I repeat my mistakes less frequently over time
- I know that constructive criticism is not a personal attack, but an opportunity to grow
- I know it takes time & effort to change behaviors, and I am committed to making my best effort
I LISTEN ATTENTIVELY
- I pay attention to whomever is speaking
- I refrain from talking to my neighbors or friends when someone else is talking
- I make the effort to tune in when someone is speaking, because this person deserves my respect, and I can learn from what he or she is sharing
- My body language demonstrates openness and interest
I THINK CREATIVELY
- I know that being original is a strength
- I push myself to explore and develop my unique ideas
- I welcome fresh and unexpected ideas and ways of doing things
- I try to solve problems in creative & unconventional ways
Monday, February 7, 2011
Much to Update About
I haven't been very good at recording much (if any) of Zoe's latest antics and Evan's developmental milestones. I don't feel so bad about the former, though I'm sure I'd regret it later. I do feel bad about not documenting more of Evan however. I'm sure I'd look back later and wish I know how heavy Evan was at four months old and bemoan that we have so much more of this and that about Zoe. We have fallen - as predicted - into the classic second child syndrome. There is less time to obsess over little details, less time to think and ponder parenthood and so on and so forth.
All that said, I am very pleased to report two very important milestones in our lives. I'll start with Evan. He uttered his first recognizable word yesterday. The three of us were on our bed. Dennis had brought Evan in for me to feed and after placing him next to me, Dennis lied down next to Evan and promptly fell asleep. Evan fed a little, turned his entire body towards Dennis. He cooed and made a few sounds. His hands reached out and touched Dennis' shoulders, clearly trying to wake him. Then, he made some sounds followed by a very loud and clear "PA!"
The other huge milestone is that Zoe has gone successfully on her potty for the last two days (7 times for pee and once for poo). It's a huge, huge step and I am still amazed we have finally made the leap. For a while, I thought we are never going to get there (or at least not till Zoe is six or something). Zoe was so resistant and I wasn't sure how much to push her since all the books said to back off when the child resists. Let's just say that I was practically a "Tiger Mom" last Saturday over this. While I was snarling and roaring, insisting that she "sits on the potty till pee pee comes out," I was wrecked by worry and fear. I was terribly worried that I was doing Zoe great wrong by insisting, part of me worried that she was just lazy and wanted to stay infantile by having me change her all the time, part of me worried that she would feel bad when other kids or parents ask her about her lateness in potty training. The part that kept me insisting this time was because I was sure that once Zoe figured out that she can do it, she would do it, that it was fear of failure that kept her from potty training. I'm not sure if my theories are accurate, and how much the proffered punishment of "no desserts till potty trained," and reward of "a trip to Disneyland" helped. No matter. So far, right now, we are officially in Day 2. And we are all proud we are here!! Zoe was so jubilant! That alone made me happy.
All that said, I am very pleased to report two very important milestones in our lives. I'll start with Evan. He uttered his first recognizable word yesterday. The three of us were on our bed. Dennis had brought Evan in for me to feed and after placing him next to me, Dennis lied down next to Evan and promptly fell asleep. Evan fed a little, turned his entire body towards Dennis. He cooed and made a few sounds. His hands reached out and touched Dennis' shoulders, clearly trying to wake him. Then, he made some sounds followed by a very loud and clear "PA!"
The other huge milestone is that Zoe has gone successfully on her potty for the last two days (7 times for pee and once for poo). It's a huge, huge step and I am still amazed we have finally made the leap. For a while, I thought we are never going to get there (or at least not till Zoe is six or something). Zoe was so resistant and I wasn't sure how much to push her since all the books said to back off when the child resists. Let's just say that I was practically a "Tiger Mom" last Saturday over this. While I was snarling and roaring, insisting that she "sits on the potty till pee pee comes out," I was wrecked by worry and fear. I was terribly worried that I was doing Zoe great wrong by insisting, part of me worried that she was just lazy and wanted to stay infantile by having me change her all the time, part of me worried that she would feel bad when other kids or parents ask her about her lateness in potty training. The part that kept me insisting this time was because I was sure that once Zoe figured out that she can do it, she would do it, that it was fear of failure that kept her from potty training. I'm not sure if my theories are accurate, and how much the proffered punishment of "no desserts till potty trained," and reward of "a trip to Disneyland" helped. No matter. So far, right now, we are officially in Day 2. And we are all proud we are here!! Zoe was so jubilant! That alone made me happy.
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