All the things Zoe said today:
During toothbrushing time, she told Dennis: "I think you need to help me Papa. I am too exhausted to do it myself."
To me: "My butt is hurting. I need to put it down gently"
Thursday, June 17, 2010
The Joy of Zoe
Both Dennis and I feel so lucky that we have somehow managed to produce a daughter like Zoe. Her jabber, her spontaneous songs, her bright smile, her affectionate ways all bring joy to us. Zoe has been especially affectionate to me. She would say, "I love you, Mama Bird!" or "You are my sweet, purple butterfly." I am taking care to savor it. I imagine that this love, if we are lucky, will stay and grow. But she would probably express it less exuberantly over time as she seeks independence and separation.
Anyhow, I was inspired to revisit some of William Blake's poetry this evening and I thought this is how I feel about Zoe and and bun 2.
Nurse's Song - Songs of Innocence
When voices of children are heard on the green,
And laughing is heard on the hill,
My heart is at rest within my breast,
And everything else is still.
'Then come home, my children, the sun is gone down,
And the dews of night arise;
Come, come, leave off play, and let us away,
Till the morning appears in the skies.'
And laughing is heard on the hill,
My heart is at rest within my breast,
And everything else is still.
'Then come home, my children, the sun is gone down,
And the dews of night arise;
Come, come, leave off play, and let us away,
Till the morning appears in the skies.'
'No, no, let us play, for it is yet day,
And we cannot go to sleep;
Besides, in the sky the little birds fly,
And the hills are all covered with sheep.'
'Well, well, go and play till the light fades away,
And then go home to bed.'
The little ones leaped, and shouted, and laughed,
And all the hills echoed.
And we cannot go to sleep;
Besides, in the sky the little birds fly,
And the hills are all covered with sheep.'
'Well, well, go and play till the light fades away,
And then go home to bed.'
The little ones leaped, and shouted, and laughed,
And all the hills echoed.
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Blight in the Garden
Sadly, it looks like blight or some kind of fungus infection has arrived in our garden. All but one of our zucchini plants have white spots all over the leaves. One is covered in a down of white. The tomatoes on that bed - two of them - were so healthy before. They have been looking wilted and listless the last two days. Watering didn't help. I am beginning to think they have blight.
Blight is bad news. They travel. The spores are carried by wind. I'll make an attempt at curbing it tomorrow with a milk treatment (apparently, a diluted 1 to 10 parts solution is a great fungal treatment) and also cutting back of some of the plants. I hope it helps. I'm quite bumped by it. I have been watching the zucchinis closely for two weeks now. But the eggplants and tomatoes is a real bummer. They were just starting to fruit!
I guess this is a rite of passage for any home gardener (or I should say wannabe homesteader): Dealing with diseases and bugs.
Zoe studying my book on plant diseases and insects. She loves the pictures of bugs.
Our eggplant when it still looked relatively healthy. In retrospect, the leaf in the foreground already looks ill.
Blight is bad news. They travel. The spores are carried by wind. I'll make an attempt at curbing it tomorrow with a milk treatment (apparently, a diluted 1 to 10 parts solution is a great fungal treatment) and also cutting back of some of the plants. I hope it helps. I'm quite bumped by it. I have been watching the zucchinis closely for two weeks now. But the eggplants and tomatoes is a real bummer. They were just starting to fruit!
I guess this is a rite of passage for any home gardener (or I should say wannabe homesteader): Dealing with diseases and bugs.
Zoe studying my book on plant diseases and insects. She loves the pictures of bugs.
Birthing Plan
I have been thinking more about the delivery of bun 2. I had, when I first got pregnant, assumed that I'd have to do a Cesarean birth again. I remember asking John, who is an OB/GYN about this point soon after we had Zoe by Cesarean birth. He had said that about 80% of patients are directed to have a second C-section. However, on the day Dennis and I told our pregnancy to John, he mentioned that the policy/guidelines regarding VBAC (Vaginal birth after Cesarean) is under debate again. It appears that there is some rethinking about VBAC and the risk assessment regarding the primary reason for shunning it - primarily uterine rupture at last cut - as well as the costs and risks of repeat Cesarean birth. He spoke strongly of studies indicating the high risks of repeat C-sections, and the benefits of vaginal birth for both the mother and the child.
I want what is good for my child and myself, which means I should attempt a VBAC. Luckily for us, Kaiser is fairly supportive of VBAC. And the doctor I have been seeing - Dr. Beecher - is not opposed to it. (Apparently, some insurance does not allow it and some hospitals' malpractice insurance forbids it too. Interesting, considering how C-section is so much more expensive than vaginal birth. Most women who have had a previous Cesarean birth do not end up with vaginal birth the second time round. Here, most is at about the 90%, according to the National Institute of Health. That's a huge number. But it hasn't always been this way. Back in 1996, nearly 3 in 10 women (or 28.3%) who had a previous Cesarean birth managed to give birth through the vagina. What changed between the years?)
Anyhow, we discussed it and the current plan is for us to try a VBAC if I go into natural birth by due date, and to schedule for a Cesarean birth should I go over due date. Induction is no longer a possibility as the chemicals used for inducing babies apparently lead to high incidences of ruptures, which is vastly dangerous for both mother and child.
Since I did more research on this topic and having talked to my OB, I regret that I allowed so much intervention in Zoe's birth. I've learned that Pitucin - the drug used to induce labor - causes stronger contractions that actually stresses out the baby. The stronger contractions leads to more discomfort and more intense pain, which then increases the likelihood of a woman in labor to ask for an epidural. The epidural relaxes the muscles and numbs the lower pelvic area in such a way that slows down labor, which then leads to another dose of Pitucin, thus doubling the stress level to mother and child. At the same time, as the baby makes its way down the birth canal, it has higher propensity to get stuck in the sunny side up position now that the mother is relaxed by epidural and not able to shift about (being stuck on the bed) or push. The result? More intervention culminating in Cesarean birth. Well, that sounds like my birthing experience with Zoe!
There is still more reading, thinking and researching to do (see http://consensus.nih.gov/2010/vbac.htm).
But his much I know right now, I'll threaten to sue any nurse or doctor who tries to put Pitucin into my system or tries to break my water to speed up the process. (Yet another surprising thing the doctor said today. They would not induce, but the medical team at the hospital may want to use Pitucin if labor becomes stalled. But I thought they just said it increases my risk of rupture?) Also, I want to move around. I learned this much about the labor process, lying horizontal with the legs wide apart is the worst possible position for pushing. This means I can't have epidural. I'm going to try!
I want what is good for my child and myself, which means I should attempt a VBAC. Luckily for us, Kaiser is fairly supportive of VBAC. And the doctor I have been seeing - Dr. Beecher - is not opposed to it. (Apparently, some insurance does not allow it and some hospitals' malpractice insurance forbids it too. Interesting, considering how C-section is so much more expensive than vaginal birth. Most women who have had a previous Cesarean birth do not end up with vaginal birth the second time round. Here, most is at about the 90%, according to the National Institute of Health. That's a huge number. But it hasn't always been this way. Back in 1996, nearly 3 in 10 women (or 28.3%) who had a previous Cesarean birth managed to give birth through the vagina. What changed between the years?)
Anyhow, we discussed it and the current plan is for us to try a VBAC if I go into natural birth by due date, and to schedule for a Cesarean birth should I go over due date. Induction is no longer a possibility as the chemicals used for inducing babies apparently lead to high incidences of ruptures, which is vastly dangerous for both mother and child.
Since I did more research on this topic and having talked to my OB, I regret that I allowed so much intervention in Zoe's birth. I've learned that Pitucin - the drug used to induce labor - causes stronger contractions that actually stresses out the baby. The stronger contractions leads to more discomfort and more intense pain, which then increases the likelihood of a woman in labor to ask for an epidural. The epidural relaxes the muscles and numbs the lower pelvic area in such a way that slows down labor, which then leads to another dose of Pitucin, thus doubling the stress level to mother and child. At the same time, as the baby makes its way down the birth canal, it has higher propensity to get stuck in the sunny side up position now that the mother is relaxed by epidural and not able to shift about (being stuck on the bed) or push. The result? More intervention culminating in Cesarean birth. Well, that sounds like my birthing experience with Zoe!
There is still more reading, thinking and researching to do (see http://consensus.nih.gov/2010/vbac.htm).
But his much I know right now, I'll threaten to sue any nurse or doctor who tries to put Pitucin into my system or tries to break my water to speed up the process. (Yet another surprising thing the doctor said today. They would not induce, but the medical team at the hospital may want to use Pitucin if labor becomes stalled. But I thought they just said it increases my risk of rupture?) Also, I want to move around. I learned this much about the labor process, lying horizontal with the legs wide apart is the worst possible position for pushing. This means I can't have epidural. I'm going to try!
Friday, June 11, 2010
Bun 2
I am currently 25 weeks pregnant with Bun Two. Every day his kicks grow stronger and it is quite a wonderful feeling to feel him move about. Perhaps I remember incorrectly, but I believe he is - at this stage - less opinionated than Zoe. If ever I pressed too close to the table, fetus Zoe would kick really hard. Bun Two seems to be more easy going. From this, I like to imagine that he is in temperament a lot like Dennis. Gentle and kind in all ways. Very patient. That would be good. Zoe seems to be more like me in the patience department, which is to say, not very.
Only 15 weeks to go! I'm still debating whether to attempt VBAC. I was very convinced that that is what I want. But a little part of me is worried. Different doctors say different things about the cost and benefits and risk. My mom - and I'm sure Dennis' mom would say the same thing - pray and it will be just alright. We'll see!
Only 15 weeks to go! I'm still debating whether to attempt VBAC. I was very convinced that that is what I want. But a little part of me is worried. Different doctors say different things about the cost and benefits and risk. My mom - and I'm sure Dennis' mom would say the same thing - pray and it will be just alright. We'll see!
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Daikon Greens
I thinned out some of the daikon I started out from seed a couple of weeks ago. I probably would have thrown the greens into compost bin if mom didn't tell me that they are in fact edible. Come to think of it, why shouldn't they be edible? I stir fried it with garlic and it was quite tasty. I expected it to be peppery, but it tasted slightly like pea shoots plus spinach. I also stir fried some freshly harvested green beans. Dennis and I thought the vegetables really tasty and sweet today.
On edibility, I learned that the nasturtiums are actually edible! We have a lot of them in our garden. I planted them around our zucchinis. They supposedly deter the bugs that love zucchinis (I say it works pretty well, but not completely). And how they grew! I have had to cut them back so that they don't completely choke out the Zucchinis. I think we might have them for dinner tomorrow night. Dennis and I were talking about how we eat a wider variety of vegetables these days, no longer confined to just salad greens, carrots, tomatoes, zucchinis, broccoli, cauliflower, and the occasional cucumber, frozen green beans, peas and packaged beets. I guess that's good!
On edibility, I learned that the nasturtiums are actually edible! We have a lot of them in our garden. I planted them around our zucchinis. They supposedly deter the bugs that love zucchinis (I say it works pretty well, but not completely). And how they grew! I have had to cut them back so that they don't completely choke out the Zucchinis. I think we might have them for dinner tomorrow night. Dennis and I were talking about how we eat a wider variety of vegetables these days, no longer confined to just salad greens, carrots, tomatoes, zucchinis, broccoli, cauliflower, and the occasional cucumber, frozen green beans, peas and packaged beets. I guess that's good!
My Fair Lady
Zoe got to watch snippets of "My Fair Lady" when Haraboji and Harmoni were here visiting. It made quite an impression on our little one. Zoe has been talking about the white dress Audrey Hepburn worn to the ball. Just now, she was "throwing a party." And this is what she said of it:
"Look, I'm all dressed up for my party. Look Mama, I'm dressed up like a lady. And this is my dress just like the one the lady wore in My Fair Lady."
Zoe, who was in her blue PJs, was using her imagination. Imagination and pretend are such useful devices. With it, we are one minute at the beach and another at a grand ballroom.
"Look, I'm all dressed up for my party. Look Mama, I'm dressed up like a lady. And this is my dress just like the one the lady wore in My Fair Lady."
Zoe, who was in her blue PJs, was using her imagination. Imagination and pretend are such useful devices. With it, we are one minute at the beach and another at a grand ballroom.
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Garden Growth
It appears that the few strawberry transplants I put into the ground have recovered from the neglect and abuse I put them through. I wasn't sure if they were going to make it since they looked so at the brink of death when I put them in. I'm glad to see them flowering and even fruiting!
I got around to thinning out the Choggia beets I started as seeds some weeks ago. I took out 14 ounce of it and I guess we'll be eating stir-fried beet greens some time this week. It is pretty amazing. The little plot we cultivated is already providing us with so much greens that we really have no need to buy any vegetables from the market anymore.
On a different note, we finally - after more than two months of delay - planted the plum tree yesterday. We had it set on the west side of our property and today I scattered carrot, shiso and lettuce seeds around the tree. I put the carrot seeds further away from the root ball so that they don't disturb the roots of the plum tree.
I got around to thinning out the Choggia beets I started as seeds some weeks ago. I took out 14 ounce of it and I guess we'll be eating stir-fried beet greens some time this week. It is pretty amazing. The little plot we cultivated is already providing us with so much greens that we really have no need to buy any vegetables from the market anymore.
On a different note, we finally - after more than two months of delay - planted the plum tree yesterday. We had it set on the west side of our property and today I scattered carrot, shiso and lettuce seeds around the tree. I put the carrot seeds further away from the root ball so that they don't disturb the roots of the plum tree.
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Strangers and Candy
We had an encounter with an elderly gentleman today that served as a reminder on the importance of teaching Zoe about strangers. Zoe and I were walking into Nijiya to get lunch when we passed this elderly man sitting outside on the table. He smiled at Zoe with such delight we could only smile back. This old man was no longer there when we came back out with our own lunch. But he showed up before long and made eye contact, and then proceeded to sit down a short distance away from us. I got the feeling that he was going to offer Zoe something to drink (he was opening one for himself) and decided not to. All that time, he was watching Zoe the way a grandfather watches a grandchild, with a beaming smile. Then, he got up and we waved goodbye. I saw him push his shopping cart away into the parking lot. But he returned with the cart and went into the store again. This time he came out and pushed the cart straight to us and proceeded to offer Zoe a piece of candy. What can I say? I didn't want to outright rebuff him - he is probably just lonely and wistful for a grandchild. But I also wasn't comfortable with Zoe taking candies from stranger. I nodded my head and Zoe took it. The old man said he would have one himself. And Zoe wanted her candy right then. So I opened it for her. He smiled and then seemed to go away only to return to try to offer her another one. I shook my head and used the excuse of "limiting her sugar." He replied "oh, at this age, it is ok!" He offered the second time and Zoe took it. Sigh! Quite naturally, I had her say thank you and could not wait till he was out of ear shot to explain to her that she must never, never take candies from strangers when mama and papa are not around. And also that she must never follow strangers just because they offer candies. She must always stick close to mama and papa! What a conundrum! I don't want to freak her out. I would like for her to feel free to wave hi to people she meets on the street, but I also want her to have a healthy skepticism of strangers and never to succumb to offers of candy. I'm going to have to talk to her again about the appropriate behavior towards strangers. Anyhow, I was so anxious to get out of there - the old man was hovering about us the whole hour we were there - that I skipped shopping at Nijiya after lunch.
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Challenges Ahead
We are so grateful and happy that our little vegetable pad is doing well - thus far at least. There were instances of suspected fungal issues (which went away after I watered less straight after transplanting and avoided overhead watering), some aphids issue (which we resolved by releasing a whole lot of ladybugs into the garden), and caterpillar issues (which we determined were the bad sort and is currently under control by the use of some neem oil as well as physical removal of the voracious eaters). I am still watching the lemon and blueberry shrubs carefully, which all seem to be malnourished or not quite 100% given their yellowing or disfiguring leaves. For them, I've added iron and sulphur as well as other nutrients. I hope it's not Nematodes or other more serious disease I am not aware of. I've been reading so much trying to figure out what's wrong (and what to do), yet one can never be sure based simply on a few pictures. Just as when Dennis was ill (he is all well again, thank goodness. A case of food poisoning or stomach flu is what we think it is), all his symptoms corresponded to all kinds of illnesses. Same with the plant leaves coloring that I tried to match to pictures I find on the internet. For now, as a matter of expediency (for lack of time), I can only sit back, observe, and hope that I've provided the best possible care already and hope the plants have sufficient reserves to fight back on their own.
Looking ahead, there is so much to do still. Since we didn't grow up with gardening and do not have natural green thumbs (they were heretofore rather black), we embarked on this in a rather academic fashion. That is, we haul loads of gardening books home from the library, I signed up for classes, we research online, take notes.... Part of the challenge is that not only do we want to grow food, we want to do it ecologically, sustainably, and do it beautifully. And did I mention economically yet? In short, not only do we (or I) have to come up with a grand design in terms of uses and look/style, we (or I) have to think about and incorporate all kinds of ecological and biological variables that would make or break the plan.
And there is so much to think about! How to design such that we can have a sustainable garden that invites friendly wildlife, have an area to entertain and have fun with the children, as well as relax and unwind? What would go where?
We say patience. Sit back and observe first the land, how the sun falls, the wind blows, the life that the soil supports (weeds)... however, sometimes, the weeds and the general messiness makes my heart impatient. Still, I'll have to be patient. Bun 2 will be arriving in three months and some and I expect I won't have much time in the immediate months after to do too much planning.
Looking ahead, there is so much to do still. Since we didn't grow up with gardening and do not have natural green thumbs (they were heretofore rather black), we embarked on this in a rather academic fashion. That is, we haul loads of gardening books home from the library, I signed up for classes, we research online, take notes.... Part of the challenge is that not only do we want to grow food, we want to do it ecologically, sustainably, and do it beautifully. And did I mention economically yet? In short, not only do we (or I) have to come up with a grand design in terms of uses and look/style, we (or I) have to think about and incorporate all kinds of ecological and biological variables that would make or break the plan.
And there is so much to think about! How to design such that we can have a sustainable garden that invites friendly wildlife, have an area to entertain and have fun with the children, as well as relax and unwind? What would go where?
We say patience. Sit back and observe first the land, how the sun falls, the wind blows, the life that the soil supports (weeds)... however, sometimes, the weeds and the general messiness makes my heart impatient. Still, I'll have to be patient. Bun 2 will be arriving in three months and some and I expect I won't have much time in the immediate months after to do too much planning.
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