Helping Mommy - Or Not

New Toys

I went out to get a bunch of new toys for Zoe yesterday. I realized that Zoe has - except for her favorite push toys - exhausted her interest in all of her other toys. Also, I realized, a bit guiltily, that even though we think the house is full of toys already, she really doesn't have all that many. It was all remedied by a quick trip to Toys R' Us and after some searching on Craigslist. I am glad to report that Zoe is well pleased with the change. Dennis and I are too, actually. The pleasure of seeing Zoe giggle and bounce up and down with joy at the new things is immense. Here you see her exhibiting her artistic talents.

Grandpa Asks, Grandpa Gets!

It's been a very tiring few days for me. Dennis came down with a bad case of gout last Thursday and since then, I have been the only one holding fort around the house. I always appreciated all the things big and small Dennis do for us after he comes home from a day at work, but I really appreciate it now that I know what it is like to not have them. All that said, I'm very happy to report that Dennis' toe is doing better and that he is not all wretched about it any more.

Anyhow, I know that Grandpa has been asking to see a video of Zoe pushing the Radio Flyer Walker Wagon that Kaelem very generously loaned to Zoe. So here it is. Grandpa asks and Grandpa gets! (albeit with some delay ;) )



Zoe loves pushing this wagon around and we think she plays shopping cart with it. Zoe likes to push it around and put things into it as she goes around the house.

Monkey Girl

We love Zoe's new monkey-themed footie pajamas.

Buckles

Zoe spent some time examining the buckles to her highchair yesterday. We love how she made all these talking, cooing noises as if she was talking herself through it. Ba da ba: "Let's see, this one goes to here..." Ba: "How did mommy do it? I can figure it out."

Eating with spoon

Zoe has reached the stage where she develops in leaps and bounds. All those months of practice! She is finally putting it together. She started to toddle tentatively about a week ago. And she is more and more successful with the spoons.

Milestones

I don't know which is more exciting to report first: Zoe's first steps (real steps, three of them) or first kiss bestowed (to daddy). Or - there is more - that she drank just about 6 oz of milk in one sitting of her own free will (she sometimes take 6 oz of milk over three days). Oh! What a day.

Actually, I didn't see Zoe's first step. I was in the kitchen cooking when I heard Dennis yell "Honey! She's walking!!!!" I ran out, but it was too late, Zoe was back to her hands and knees. I encouraged her to "walk," but all she did was crawl over to me demanding to be carried. Oh well. I wish I saw it, but I'm glad that Dennis was there to see it for he was so worried that he would be at work when she takes her first steps. It's a good day for Dennis. Not long after, Zoe kissed his cheeks for the first time. He said "kiss Papa," and she did! Tenderly, sweetly. It was a priceless moment.

I guess Zoe decided she can't leave mom empty handed - she didn't kiss me, even after I planted my cheeks in front of her in the most endearing, beseeching way - and so drank a whole lot of milk right before bed. That was almost better than a kiss!

New Video

I've been busy reading about the election, analysis about the candidates' plans, and the American political process, which is why I haven't been blogging of late. I have been more active on Facebook, posting links and what not regarding the financial meltdown, health care plan of Obama and McCain, and Palin. Anyhow, enough about that. Here is a video of Zoe we took a couple of days ago. She is growing. Not in the actual weight and length sense - the child does not eat much. But she is gaining skills and confidence day by day.

Division of Labor and little changes at home.

"Parents are responsible for what is presented to eat and the manner in which it is presented. Children are responsible for how much and even whether they eat." - Ellyn Satter

Ever since I picked up the book called "How To Get Your Kid To Eat...But Not Too Much," I have been a reformed mom. Reading the book, I realized how mealtimes have become unpleasant, high pressure events for Zoe. "Yum, Yum!" I would chant. The spoon was always hovering about ready to be thrust into her mouth. Sometimes I sneaked a spoonful of food in as she opened her mouth to nibble on the bread at hand. How I cheered when she took the food. All these, alas, according to the book's author, Ellyn Satter, were pressuring tactics. And even though I knew I have to give her control of how much she consumed, as instructed by pediatricians like Dr. Brazelton, I often tried to get Zoe to take that "one more bite." And of course, the more I tried, the more she resisted. And, of course, the more she resisted by refusing to eat, the more anxious I became and the more I tried to get her to eat by persuasion or coercion, both of which never did work.

So, following the core advise of the book, I've forsworn trying to get Zoe to eat more and instead to trust that she will eat what she needs. I knew this of course, but it was hard to implement given the fact that Zoe is on the small side (even for an Asian). Anyhow, this may have been important before, it is especially important now that Zoe is at the stage where she wants to assert herself as a separate person. So, I am responsible for providing her with healthy, nutritious (and hopefully tasty) food in small to moderate quantities. She can decide how much she wants to eat, if any. And baby can ask for more if she wants more. It's been quite wonderful not having struggles (overt or covert) at mealtimes. I am more relaxed. Zoe seems to be happy with mommy's new mentality. She seems to be eating better. Just the other day, much to my delight, she demolished the cantaloupe I cut up for her. No urging needed. I simply put the pieces on her tray and then proceeded to eat my portion.

Another change we adopted (or are adopting) is eating together as a family. Except for breakfast, Zoe's mealtimes used to come before ours. That came about because we had to spoon feed her before, which was a full time job. Now that she is feeding herself and seems to want to eat what we eat, and now that we are adopting a more hands off attitude towards her eating, we decided it is time to partake meals together. This means a very early dinner - 6 pm at the latest. This is great as early dinners are better from the health standpoint and leaves us more time in the evening after Zoe has been put to bed to do other things. This also means that dinner preparation must be done by me while Zoe takes her afternoon nap. In short, not a whole lot of rest time in the afternoon for me. Also, no more dinner preparation as a couple activity in the evening. Dennis and I promised ourselves that we would do the long, lingering dinner preparations together on the weekends.

Yosemite Adventures

Because the soul craved to roam "through the dusky wild... and seeks the rocks where billows roll," we drove up to Yosemite over the weekend for some hiking. It would have been a great weekend simply for that reason. But it was made even better because we got to visit our friends Joy and Mark, who are rangers in Yosemite. Joy is Dennis' friend from the high school days.

We believe that this is our most successful road trip with Zoe thus far, even though there were times when she was less than happy. The picture below is evidence of that.

On the trail to Elizabeth Lake, Zoe started to complain. Though she spoke in Babyese, I believe she said "No. No. No!"

Luckily for us, she found Bunny and promptly regained her good humor.

Still, it was all in all a very good trip. We managed to do two short hikes (about 4.8 miles) on both days. Funny how our lives have changed. 4.8 miles in easy terrain used to be a really short hike easily accomplished in two to three hours. These days, with all the stops to feed baby and what not, 4.8 miles is quite good!

On the way to Sentinel Dome

On Sentinel Dome

There were quite a few firsts on this trip. Zoe climbed her first flight of stairs at Joy and Mark's new abode. She got to crawl around Sentinel Dome (I have been pretty protective so far, letting her crawl around only at home). She had her first taste of chocolate (courtesy of Auntie Joy). She had her first bath in a real bath tub. She peed on both Mommy and Daddy for the first time.

Exploring Sentinel Dome

Helping Mommy Pack

I had Zoe in the bedroom with me as I packed for our sojourn to Yosemite this weekend. The little rascal was playing happily with the clothes I had stacked when, suddenly, she decided she would help mommy pack.

Grandma and Grandpa's Visit

Grandma and grandpa came to town to celebrate with us Zoe's first birthday. Even though Zoe's reception to her grandparent's arrival was an immediate wail followed by tears and trembling, she allowed grandpa to hold and hug her by the next morning. By Friday morning, she was the best of friends with them and making full use of their love by taking great liberties with grandpa's laptop. (And showing grandpa she can rotate his entire screen 90 degrees just like that). By Monday, when grandma and grandpa left, Zoe showed distinct signs of missing them. She went around looking for them. She kept crawling back to the part of the living room where grandpa camped out with his laptop. It was a little heartbreaking to see her missing her grandparents already. We can't wait till she gets to spend time with them again.